THE MILSTEAD APARTMENTS!

Livin' arrangements in Munday, Texas
Were awfully hard to find.
But the Milstead Apartments, as gross as they were,
Had a welcoming old 'vacant' sign!

I'd been married to my sweet wife
For barely one short week.
We moved to the Milstead Apartments
It was almost like living rent free!

Sweet Ann got up to relieve herself
In the middle of the night.
And what she saw in the bath- room, then,
Was surely an awesome sight.

She came back to wake me,
Mixed thoughts in her head,
About what I might do
If she startled me instead.

She whispered like this
As I rose from the bed,
'There's a mouse in the bathroom
And I don't think he's dead!'

Much to my surprise,
Overwhelmed with such fear,
The huge rat I saw
Was as big as a deer!

I banged with a broom
Ere I had half a chance,
And scared her to death
With each whack and each glance!

Giving no thought to the neighbors that night
I continued to fight to the death!
Determined to vanquish that 'mouse,' all right,
Even with my final breath!

'Don't open that door ,' I cried out in fear!
'This creature will get the both of us.
If I'm not finished by 5:00 am
Call the local police...request rush!'

I flailed the wall as he leapt so high.
I whammed that linoleum floor.
Many mad dashes were made by us both
Tryin' to get out that door!

Now we got rid of that 'mouse' that night
But were still in a terrible fix.
For the people next door were real puzzled.
It was a paper-thin walled duplex!


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