WRAP > Article/Quotes > Character Quotes > Shirley

The Essential Shirley Brahms

With that curious mix of naiveté and wit, Shirley always seems to be able to cut to the heart of the matter -- no matter how odd, or funny, it might sound to someone else.

"I'm looking for Dallas and all I'm getting is Coronation Street."		"Wouldn't it better if he shouted up her skirt?"
	"Isn't it amazing how freedom from poverty brings the best in people?"
"If your brains was dynamite, you still wouldn't 'ave enough to blow your ears off."		"You have to have two or they won't wobble."
	"I came top at school in joined-up handwriting."
"My tail's come off. Would you put it on for me?"		"Look, you do your thing your way, and I'll do my thing my way."
	"I never wear anything in bed. I don't like rough things next to my skin."
"Oooh, you know, I wish I'd put on thicker knickers this morning."		" 'Ang on a minute; I'm not bleedin' Cinderella!"
	"May I say what a pleasure it is having your son on the floor?"