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On Courtship
The good or ill hap of a good or ill life, is the good or ill
choice of a good or ill wife.
Before you run in double harness look well to the other horse.
It is not every couple that is a pair.
Choose a wife rather by your ear than your eye.
Before your youth with marriage is oppressed,
Make sure of one who suits your humor best;
Such choicest damsel drops not from the sky,
She must be sought for with a studious eye.
Who weds a sot to get his cot
Will lose his cot and keep the sot.
Don't be in a hurry to tie what you can't untie.
Be sure before you marry of a house wherein to tarry.
Take heed that what charmeth thee is real, nor springeth of
thine own imagination; and suffer not trifles to win thy love.
Beauty without merit and virtue is a bait for fools.
Beauty and folly are often companions.
You must judge a maiden at the kneading trough, and not in a
dance.
Take a vine of good soil, and a daughter of a good mother.
"If all lovers were to marry," said Don Quixote, "parents would
lose their right of marrying their children when and to whom
they choose. And if the choice of husband were left to the
daughter's pleasure, there would be one who would pick her
father's groom, and another some passer-by in the street, whom
she might fancy a brave and fine fellow though he might be a
debauched swashbuckler. For love and fancy easily blind the
eyes of the understanding which are so necessary in choosing
one's estate. The state of matrimony is in great danger from
errors, and it needs much circumspection and the particular
favour of Heaven to make a good choice. For if a prudent man
wants to take a long journey he seeks a safe and peaceful
companion to go with him, before setting out on the road. Why
then should not he do the same when he has to travel all his
life, right up to the resting place of death; all the more so
since his companion must be with him at bed and at board and
everywhere, as the wife is with her husband. The companionship
of one's own wife is not merchandise which, once bought, can be
returned or bartered or exchanged; for marriage is an
inseparable condition which lasts as long as life endures. It
is a noose which becomes a Gordian knot once you put it around
your neck, for if Death's scythe does not cut it, there is no
untying it."
Cervantes. Don Quixote.
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