DISCLAIMER: I do not own any of the characters from Buffy
the Vampire Slayer, Joss Whedon and the WB own all rights. And get to reap all the
benefits, lucky stiffs.
.The Gift
part 5
by bec
Chapter XVIII
Giles stood behind the counter in the library waiting for the group to arrive. From the rushed phone call from Willow he was under the impression that something was happening, something that would require his books and papers. He had collected those books that he felt he would need near by in cases like these. Willow had mentioned the words "Master vampire." That did not sit well with Giles, he remembered the last time Buffy had gone up against a master. She had died.
Giles looked up as the double doors slammed open. Spike came through first carrying Rissa; he had wrapped his coat around her, which was ludicrous Giles thought. Why would Marissa need a coat, the cold didn’t affect her. But as he looked at her, he could understand why. She was shaking from head to toe and she was trembling with a fierceness that caused her teeth to rattle.
Giles rushed to move the books he had strewn across the table. Spike laid her in their place but didn’t release her. He kept his arm around her shoulders, telling her to lie back.
"What happened?" Giles asked.
"Trouble," Buffy answered as she came through the door with the rest of the gang. They all started talking at once, Giles couldn’t follow. He raised his voice for silence, "Quiet!"
Everyone stopped talking at once. Giles turned to Buffy again. "Now you may explain what happened. Willow said something about a "Master" Vampire?"
Buffy walked to the table and looked at Marissa. "Yeah, his name is Darius. He’s somebody from Marissa’s past."
"From our past." Angel spoke up. "We ran with him in the early 1900's. He’s trouble, big trouble."
"Did you see how he didn’t even act like anything was up while the fight was going on?" Xander said nervously. "Just backed up a few feet and watched everything with a really weird smile on his face, like it was all a game or something?"
"This IS a game to Darius," Marissa said. She sat up and looked at the people around her. "This is not your fight. I will not allow you to involve yourself in this."
Buffy smiled at her. "Well you really don’t get a choice in this, he is in Sunnydale, Sunnydale is my turf, anything happens here, I’m involved."
Giles turned to Angel, "Is he a Master Vampire? I that what are we talking about here?"
"He is very old, he’s been around longer than a lot of vampires. He does have powers, black powers and he has always had an interest in witchcraft. He’s studied it on all four continents; he’s studied with the best. We are talking bad, really bad." Angel said.
"Well, maybe I could help?" Willow said.
"NO!"
Everyone jumped as Marissa spoke. "No, not with Darius, his power’s are far more advanced then yours, he would tear you apart, I will not have you hurt. No one is going up against him, this is my fight."
"Your fight? I don’t bloody well think so; you couldn’t even move back there. Just seeing him again caused you to freeze up," Spike said, speaking for the first time since entering the library. "If you think I’m gonna let you go up against him alone, forget it. You’re out of your bloody freaking mind."
"You do not have any say in what I do or do not do," Marissa said. She pulled herself off of the tabletop, removing Spike’s coat as she stood up. She went to hand it to him but he made no move to take it. They stood staring at each other, neither one willing to give in to the other. Finally, she turned her eyes away and laid the coat on the table and stepped away from Spike.
"Marissa, I’m not trying to be the big meany here, but Spike’s right, you froze, you couldn’t handle even seeing him. How are you going to fight him alone? You can’t, but then again, you don’t have too," Buffy said.
"Yeah, that’s what’s so neat about having a Slayer around. You’re never alone in a good fight," Xander said jokingly. "Or in a bad one either, for that matter."
Marissa ignored him. She spoke directly to Buffy. "You do not understand what you are getting yourself into here. Darius wants me, not you. This is not your fight. It is mine."
"You mentioned a prophecy in the Van, what prophecy?" Willow asked. She moved closer to the table. "I think you called it ‘The Gift’?"
"Darius has always held a strong interest in old prophecies and legends. He believes they will bring him power, Marissa said. "He collected them like old coins. He would go to great lengths to find and own them. In the late part of the 1800's he found one that had been written by Areolas The Wizard."
"Areolas. Yes, I’ve heard of him, he was a sorcerer for Lether the Beast. Lether was a lesser known King, he lived during the time of Attila the Hun, he was . . . well, his exploits were overshadowed by . . . ah, certain things that the Hun had became well known for." Giles had removed his glasses during this speech and turned to one of the dusty tombs sitting on the counter.
"Damn what luck. A guy tries to do his best at raping and pillaging and gets knocked off the pillar by ole Attila, what a shame," quipped Xander.
"Areolas wrote many prophecies, some have come true, others were just meaningless jumbles of words. He wrote one called ‘The Gift’. It is about a woman, who can bring great gifts and powers to the man who walks at her side." Marissa said.
"Yes." Giles had found what he wanted, he read from the book aloud. "Areolas The Wizard, Sorcerer and Alchemist, he lived during the 1200's. He was one of the foremost alchemists of his time. It was rumored he actually could turn cheap metals into precious metals. He was reputed to have written thousands of prophecies."
He looked up from the pages. "And your telling us that Darius has found one of Areolas’s prophecies and has attributed it to you?"
"Yes, he is under the mistaken assumption that The Gift was written about me. He searched for a woman who fit the prophecy. He found me traveling with Spike and Angelus at the turn of the century and stayed with us for quite a while, watching and learning about me. I found out all this information during my stay with him," Marissa answered.
"And how did you come to be staying with him?" Spike asked. The others could see the demon fighting to get out. He couldn’t stand the thought of Marissa alone with Darius. "You mentioned San Francisco in the van."
"Yes. Druscilla must have called him and told him where to find me. I told you I saw you on the pier and a few hours later Darius’ men found me in the warehouse. They knocked me unconscious; when I woke up I was in some kind of basement cell, chained to the wall. He told me that I must have angered someone from our past, I thought he was speaking of you, but he must have meant Druscilla. She wanted me gone, and she did a fine job of it I would say."
"What did he do to you?" Spike questioned her.
She ignored him. "Darius believes that The Gift was written for him and I. He believes through me he will attain vast amounts of power."
"Exactly what is The Gift?" Giles asked.
Marissa turned from the group and started to recite, she had memorized these words till they were imprinted on her heart. Her voice was emotionless, as if the words didn’t touch her.
There will be a woman of strength and might;
She will walk in the world of light and dark;
By her side will walk a man of both worlds.
They shall walk in unity, walk as one.
Their paths shall twine, and split;
Always to return as one.
To repay their goodness, they shall be gifted from God;
The power, the richness, the world, will be given to them.
And they shall reign together forever . . .
The library was quiet; no one said a word.
But as always it was too much for Xander. "So what your saying is that he wants his riches and power, and he thinks you’re the only one who can get it for him?"
"Exactly." Marissa smiled and she turned back toward the group. "You have such a way with words’ Xander."
"Yes, he certainly does," Giles said. "Just how badly does he want this power and riches?"
"He will stop at nothing to get what he wants, and right now, all of you stand in his way," Marissa said. "He will not like that one bit."
"I don’t bloody care what he wants and doesn’t want, he’s not getting you," Spike said.
"For once I have to agree with Dead Boy No. 2," Xander said. "You’re one of us now, and we don’t turn our friends over to bad evil guys. No matter what."
"I have not had too many friends in my life, and I do not want to lose the few that I have now. I have trained and studied for this moment for the past 12 years, let me handle it. Please?" Marissa pleaded.
"I’m sorry, but friends don’t let friends fight alone," Buffy said. "We’re in this no matter what, so we have to figure out some kind of plan. Can you tell us everything you guys know about Darius, everything we need to know if we’re going to defeat him?"
Everyone turned to the books that Giles was rifling through on the counter. Marissa just stood and stared at them. They were not listening to her, and she had to make them listen. This just wasn’t some ordinary vampire they were up against here. She had to make them understand. "You cannot just open a book and fight Darius, he is much more complex than that."
"Then help us understand, tell us what we need to know," Buffy said. "You don’t understand something here Marissa. This is what I do, I fight evil, and if what you say is true, Darius is right up my alley. So tell us, what exactly are we talking about here. What kind of power does he have?"
"Rissa, I told you earlier, you’re not alone any more," Spike said emphatically. "And one thing I have come to understand about these humans, these particular humans, is that they will fight to the death for what they believe in, and they believe in you."
"Spike is right, you’re not alone anymore, you don’t have to face Darius alone, we’re all with you on this. Just trust us, ok." Angel smiled at her.
Tears welled up in Marissa’s eyes. She couldn’t understand this, just as she couldn’t understand the trust that they placed in each other. Why? Why were they willing to do this for her? Angel answered her questions.
"We care about you, we won’t let him hurt you, you’ve done so much for me, let us help you now?" Angel took her hand and gave it a gentle squeeze. "Tell us how to fight him."
"My papers, I’ll need my books and papers, their back at your apartment building. I’ll have to go and get them," Marissa said.
"I’ll go, you stay here. I can get there in my car a lot quicker," Spike said. "You can fill everyone in on what they need to know."
"Your car is still at the Bronze. I’ll drive you to get it," Oz said.
"I have to go with you, you will never find them, I have them hidden in a safe place," Marissa said. "I shall return with the things we will need. Until then, Giles you may find the Areolas prophecies in ‘Jocobus’ Works of Ancient Legends’, Volume 6. Do you have that work?"
"Yes I do, I have his complete works, up to Volume 34 I do believe." Giles turned to his office and went through the door. He was already enjoying the effects of a good research hunt.
"I guess we’re on stake sharping detail again?" Cordelia asked. Up until now the girl had been strangely quiet. "It’s just so hard imagining a guy with such great looks being so evil?"
"Down girl, this is the bad guy we’re talking about. No fantasizing about the bad guys, understand?" Xander said.
"I could understand if he wasn’t such a great dresser, but how come the bad guys get to dress so cool," Cordi turned to Xander, " and you dress so . . . so . . . layered?"
"Hey, layers are good, layers protect the muscles," Xander said as he steered her toward Giles locker of weapons.
"What muscles?" The girl said snidely.
Chapter XIX
Darius sat behind the old oak desk as if he was born to be there, but if one was to know the truth he was born in a dirt ditch on a battlefield somewhere in the early dawn of Rome. He never knew his father, let alone his name. His mother was one of the whores that followed the armies of soldiers from battle to battle. He learned at a very young age that nothing was ever going to be handed to him. If he wanted something, he took it. He stole to keep himself alive, food, money, clothes, whatever he needed, he took. He was caught many times, very often he was beaten or jailed for the things he had done. It was after one of those times that he returned to the hovel his mother and he shared to find her lifeless body, she had been dead for days. There had been no one to worry about her besides him, no one to help her. From that day forward he swore that he would never care about another living soul. He had kept that promise.
He had wondered from town to town until he was old enough to join the Roman army, then he had found a reason for living, a passion that still to this day filled him with a wonder and beauty he had yet to replace with anything else. Killing gave him a sense of power, it became a drug to him, a euphoria that he had never experienced before, greater than sex, greater than anything he had ever felt. The first time he had killed was when he was 14 years old. The soldier in front of him had taken him for a child, laughed at him, even as they fought. That was his fatal mistake. Darius had run his sword through the man’s chest while he still laughed, he died with the sound of his own laughter echoing in his ears. That day, Darius had stood on that bloody field and felt shivers crawl up his spine, he had looked down at the man laying at his feet, although there were hundreds of bodies on the ground that day, this body was his, he had done this, his work. He felt a power and essence fill his soul, a blackness that crept into him and stayed. When the tingling ceased, Darius knew he had found his calling.
Darius had lost his soul long before he had become a vampire.
He had met Maetha in a small town somewhere, he had long since forgotten the name, she had been traveling with a band of Egyptian dancers and whores. He had thought she was the most beautiful woman he had ever seen. She had a presence surrounding her. Watching her was like killing for Darius. He got that same feeling in the base of his spine. He had to meet her. He had no choice. He gave her money to dance for him, and she had, for hours he sat and watched her, waiting, he didn’t even know what he was waiting for, but he knew something was happening here, something he had waited for his entire life. When the music had finally stopped, she had approached him and sat down beside him, for a moment he had wondered if he had been wrong, that she wasn’t any different from any of the other whores he had bought and paid for.
"I see into your soul through your eyes, and you are in a dark, dark place," she had said to him. "I too am in a dark place. We should walk together through this path, no?"
"I will walk with you to the ends of the Earth." Darius had said, but he didn’t remember thinking the thought. It’s like she was in his soul, he understood then that she was what he had been waiting for, she was the one who would show him his true path in life.
The rest of the night was all hazy for Darius. He remembered the pain and the joy, and then the hunger. It was a hunger unlike any he had ever felt, not even when he was a small boy and went days without food. This hunger rivaled anything he could imagine. The burning, the searing, it controlled him. The haze cleared a few hours before dawn, he lay in his tent, Maetha sat and smiled a strange smile at him. He looked down to find the lifeless body of another young dancer in his arms. The memories of the night slowly came back to him, and he shuddered.
"I knew the minute I saw you, I knew that you were one of us, one of the Chosen Children of Satan." Maetha spoke quietly. "We will be happy together, won’t we lover?"
And they were happy together, well at least for a while. For more than a hundred years they traveled together, reeking havoc wherever they went. But soon Darius grew bored with Maetha, bored with the same thing over and over again. He wanted something new, Maetha went straight for the kill, whereas Darius wanted to play with his victims a little. One too many times Maetha had overstepped herself as far as Darius was concerned, she was his Sire, but he was not the type to take orders, he couldn’t sit back and let her dictate to him. He felt she just didn’t understand him enough, didn’t quite get the picture when it came to who was in charge.
The final straw came when one night in Bath, a small resort town in England she fumbled his attempts to take a mother and daughter into one of his plans. He wanted to turn them, bring them into their circle. She felt he should just feed and move on. So he told her his plans, Maetha would lure them to her room, tell them she was a runaway bride who was all alone, lost without her mother and sister. Once they were in her rooms he would take them, bring them into their world, unfortunately she left them in the common room. She told him she had changed her mind, she didn’t want anyone else joining them, she wanted it to remain the two of them. So Darius just smiled and took her into his arms, he proceeded to tell her how much he adored her, how much he loved her. He brought her to the peak of satisfaction . . . then drove a stake deep into her heart. The euphoria that hit him as he lay there with her dust surrounding him rivaled the orgasmic feeling he had felt in that field long ago. It was a sweet kill, one he would remember with a smile for the rest of his days. He never even felt a twinge of regret, he would not be controlled, he would never be a follower, he would lead, he would direct his own life. Never again would he let some whining woman dictate to him what should or shouldn’t be. Since that day he chose his own companions, vampires that would serve and protect his interest at no matter what cost.
That thought brought him back to the present. Druscilla was beginning to become a problem, she pestered him day and night to kill the slayer, return her men to her. Darius didn’t know how much more he could take from her. Her incessant whining was starting to grate on his nerves. And her madness was more of a plague than a help to him. How in the hell did Angelus and Spike survive living with this woman. No wonder they both left her. He had already decided to kill her the minute she was no longer needed for his plans.
As if thinking of her could call her forth, Druscilla boldly swept into the room, dragging her sculptured nails over the fine silk wallpaper that hung on the walls. When he took over this dwelling from the Professor who had been his first victim in this hellhole of a town, he didn’t know the joy it would bring him to sit in these well-furnished rooms and walk the halls of this mansion. Maybe when Marissa was returned to him, and all of this was behind him. He would stay. Stay and live here for however long he liked. Until he became bored again and eventually moved on.
"Darius, I feel the need, the need to do something, I need my boys back with me, when will you bring them to me?" Druscilla never even looked at Darius as she strolled around the room. "I’ve waited to long as it is, I need them, now."
If she had bothered looking at him, she would have known that now was not the time to ask him for anything. The look that came into Darius eyes was not a good one. The yellow glow of the Demon shown brightly in his eyes.
"Druscilla, I told you my dear, there is a time for everything, I will do what I have to do in my own time. Be patient my dear, soon." Darius steepled his fingers and turned to watch her.
"Patience is for children. I could eat a child right now, may we go hunting for a nice plumb little boy?" Druscilla turned and faced him for the first time. She didn’t see the glow, Darius had masked it seconds before she turned. "We haven’t hunted since the night you let them escape from that club."
"I let them escape for the plain and simple reason that I didn’t choose to kill them then and there, I have need of them, they will bring me Marissa when the time is right. As I said, I have plans for Marissa, what you do with Angelus and Spike is of no concern to me when this is all done, but until then you will wait, do you understand me Druscilla?" He smiled like a father indulging his favorite child.
Which set Druscilla off into one of her pleading modes. "But I don’t like to wait, Spike never made me wait. He would do anything I ask of him. Why won’t you?"
"Because my dear, I’m not Spike. And Spike is making you wait now isn’t he? Where is your precious Spike at this moment?" Darius taunted her. "Well, where do you think he is?"
"Probably with that whore Marissa." Druscilla pouted. She moved to stand behind Darius’s chair. She placed her hands on his shoulders.
The chair spun so fast out of her hands she almost fell, Darius grabbed her boney arms as he stood and pulled her up to his eye level. "If you want that misbegotten cur back in your bed, never, I repeat, never mention her name with his again. Marissa belongs to me, do you understand? He touches her and I will kill him. It’s that simple"
Druscilla whimpered and hunched her shoulders. "Your frightening me, please Darius, my Spikie loves me, he doesn’t want her anymore. He would never touch her, not when he can have me."
Darius just shook his head and stared into her eyes, seeing the insanity there. He couldn’t believe that this stupid arrogant woman thought that any man would prefer her to Marissa.
He left her drop to the floor. Until this was over, he needed her, her and her minions to help him. But when this was over and he received everything that was due him, this insane lump of dead flesh would feed his minions. Just thinking about watching her die brought a smile to his face. Druscilla mistook that smile for a sign that all was right in her world again. She lay her head onto Darius chest and rubbed her porcelain cheek on his silk shirt. "Everything will be back to normal soon. You will have your precious Marissa back, and Angel and Spike will be mine again. You’ll see. Mine again."
Chapter XX
Marissa inserted the key into the door. She pushed the door open and stepped through. Turning, she held the door open to let Spike enter.
"I will just be a minute." She turned to a small trunk which sat at the end of the rod iron bed. She kneeled down and inserted another key into the small steel lock. Lifting the lid with one hand, she reached in and started removing various books and notepads from the trunk. When the trunk was completely empty, she used her index fingers to pry up two corners, the bottom came up with a small popping sound.
Spike stood at the door looking around the room. On every dresser and table top were candles of various colors, shapes and sizes. He remembered how she loved the candlelight dancing off of the walls. He smiled down at her, watching her small and shapely rear without even realizing what he was doing.
Standing, she turned and caught him looking at her. She saw the look in his eyes and turned back to the trunk. She should never have allowed him to bring her here. While they were in Oz’s van she didn’t have to worry about what to say, Oz had turned the radio on and they had sat quietly and listened to the music. But once Oz dropped them off at Spike’s car she became nervous and tense. She didn’t want to be alone with him, not after their conversation at the Bronze tonight. No, enough had been said between them.
In her hand she held various notepads and mini tape cassettes. She turned and carried them to a small desk she had purchased at a second hand furniture store, she had needed somewhere to sit and do her research at night. She pulled a cloth tote bag from the shelf over the desk and started packing the items into it. She opened a small drawer and removed a tape recorder and two very old books. She placed those items in the bag too. She reached up on the top shelf and removed a small wooden box, she opened it and checked through the eclectic items that were scattered inside. Herbs, incense, feathers and what looked like small bones were among the contents.
"Is that your witch’s brewing box?" Spike asked as he walked up behind her.
"It is just some of the things I use in my castings." Marissa said as she finished putting all the things she thought she would need into the tote bag. "Different things for different spells."
"Is Darius the reason you became involved in witchcraft? You never showed a interest in it before." Spike said as he took the bag out of her hands.
She reluctantly let him take the bag from her. "Yes, I swore I would be prepared if I ever came in contact with him again."
"You didn’t look prepared tonight."
"I was . . . not expecting to see him. I am over my shock." Marissa turned to collect another book off the shelf.
"So what happens when you see him again?" Spike moved closer to her forcing her to back into the desk.
"I will deal with it, I will be ready," Marissa looked everywhere but at his face. "I will be able to handle it. You do not have to worry about me."
"Like I have a bleeding choice." Spike muttered.
Her head snapped up, she looked directly into his eyes. "You do have a choice. I am not your responsibility . . . Spike."
"Ouch, you have developed an independent streak haven’t you?" Spike laughed out loud. "Baby, I couldn’t walk away from you right now if my life depended on it."
"It may. You have never fought Darius. You have no ideal what he is capable of. You are not the hero type Spike, just walk away, it is what you do so well." Marissa stared into his eyes as she made this statement.
"I really did a number on you didn’t I?" Spike asked. He reached up and touched her cheek as he spoke. She went stiff at his touch but she didn’t pull away.
"Do not do this, please." Marissa’s voice trembled when she spoke.
"Why, are you afraid of finding out your not as indifferent to me as you like to think you are?" Spike continued to caress her check. Marissa closed her eyes. She turned her face away.
"I cannot do this, not with you," she spoke so quietly he barely heard her.
"I love you." Spike boldly said. "If Darius is gonna try to hurt you I can’t stand by and do nothing. I admit I’ve never been hero boy, but with you it’s different. I hurt you enough in your lifetime. I won’t allow anyone else too."
Marissa’s whole body went taunt, she couldn’t do this, not now, her nerves were stretched too far to handle this. "I am not the same person I was before, Darius made sure of that. I will not be protected and shielded ever again. I take care of me now, no one else has too."
"What did he do to you?" Spike asked. "What did he do to get this damn Gift you told us about?"
Marissa shook her head. She pushed hard against Spike’s chest and stepped away from him, turning her back on him. "It is none of your business what happened between Darius and me. No one will ever hurt me like that again, not him, not you."
He could hear the tears in her voice. It almost broke his heart, but something inside of him would not leave it alone, he had to know. He followed her across the room and took her into his arms. The emotions he had felt in the Bronze slammed into him again. "I promise you baby I won’t hurt you. Ever again. I’m not any good with words, I’ve never had to sprout pretty phrases or write beautiful poetry. But I can tell you this, I do love you, I’m sorry I left you with Angel, but if I had kept you with me Dru would have killed you baby. I did the only thing I could think of to save you. Hate me for it, but I did it to protect you."
"But Druscilla still hurt me, you sent me away and she still hurt me. So what difference did it make in the end. It might have put it off longer, but she still got her revenge." The tears ran down Marissa’s face, he was making her face things she didn’t want to.
Spike took his thumb and traced one of the tears, he raised it to his lips and sucked on it, the salty flavor lingered on his tongue. "I wish I had never met you."
Marissa sucked useless air into her lungs and held it there, she couldn’t believe what he just said, couldn’t believe that the one thing that kept her alive while Darius held her didn’t mean anything to him, she had thought it but to actually hear him say it hurt like hell.
Spikes’ hands firmly grasped her jawline and pulled her face closer to his. "No, that is not what I meant, I love you, I’ve loved you since you were 15 years old. What I meant is that every ounce of pain you have had in your life can be directly related to me, Angelus, Druscilla, and especially Darius."
"Darius is not your fault. I blamed you at first, but I did not understand. I thought Druscilla was not capable of calling him. I just remembered how enthralled you were of him." Marissa said quietly.
"At one time, but I came to understand that he is like Dru, he’s insane on his power. That bored me to tears rather quickly." Spike told her. "I wouldn’t wish him on my worst enemy . . . well yes, I would come to think of it."
Marissa smiled at the humor in Spike’s statement. But she wasn’t expecting what came next. Spike slowly bent his head and brushed his lips against hers. She reacted without thinking. She pushed against him as hard as she could, screaming at the same time. He let go of her so quickly she stumbled to her knees.
"No, do not touch me, please don’t hurt me, please . . ."
He reached both arms out for her, but she crawled away from him. He didn’t understand where this reaction had come from. "Ris, what’s wrong. Baby . . ."
She tried to crawl under the bed, but there wasn’t enough room, she turned blindly searching for some place to hide, anywhere to get away from him, she had to hide, she couldn’t let Darius touch her again.
Spike had no way of knowing that the minute he had kissed her Darius’s face had flashed acrossed her mind. Her mind had suddenly recalled the last man to touch her lips, the last man to get that close to her. He had no way of knowing that in her mind he had become Darius. He moved slowly, he kneeled in front of her and took her into his arms, she fought him, but he persisted. She clawed and scratched at him until she was too tired to fight any longer. When she finally quieted, he sat turning her away from him, he pulled her back against his chest. He leaned back against the bookshelf, holding her like he would never let her go. It had never entered his mind that Darius had used her in that way. Sex was not a major part of a vampires life. Blood replaced sex in his world, not too many of his kind indulged in the physical part anymore. He understood that some vampires still had sex but usually just as a use of foreplay with a victim. Druscilla only wanted it after a big kill. He knew that Angel had a sexual relationship with the slayer, but hell he loved her. Love wasn’t usually something that happened to the dead. He was under the impression he was the only vampire to actually love another of his own kind. He didn’t see much evidence to the contrary. But then again, he knew love hadn’t had anything to do with what Darius had done to Ris.
"Shhhh little one, its ok, nothing is going to hurt you. I promise" Spike spoke slowly and quietly he didn’t want to frighten her anymore. "I’m sorry, I won’t touch you again unless you want me too, all right?"
"Why would you even want to touch me?" Marissa asked him. "No man would want me, not after what Darius has done to me."
"Bullshit."
Marissa turned and looked into his eyes. Didn’t he understand what she had just said? Didn’t he realize what Darius had done to her? He had made her feel dirty, too dirty to even contemplate having a normal "human" relationship ever again.
"Whatever happened goes on Darius’s head, not yours, you were not responsible." Spike told her.
"Saying it does not change it, he raped me, over and over again. He believes that the Gift will only come to him if we are One. In the basic sense." Marissa told him as she turned to settle into his arms again.
"I still want you." Spike said as his arms tightened around her. "Hell your damn lucky I didn’t make love to you on that damn dance floor tonight."
"You made me feel that way too." Marissa said shyly. "I could not think of anything else when you held me in your arms."
"I’m holding you in my arms now, how does that make you feel?" Spike asked her. "If it makes you all scared inside, just let me know ok?"
"No, not scared, I know who you are this time. I am sorry for reacting the way I did. I think I had a flashback. I thought of Darius when you kissed me." Marissa said.
"Do you flashback a lot?" Spike asked.
"Not in a few years, right after I got away, I had flashbacks all the time. I usually blacked out afterwards. That is how Brother Luca found me. I had passed out in an alley near the shelter he ran in Canada." Marissa told him.
"How did you get away?" Spike knew Darius. He was amazed that Marissa made it out alive.
"Do you remember Diego, the young Spanish vampire that was always with Darius?" At Spikes nod, Marissa went on. "He was jealous of me, it turns out that they have more of a bond than master and servant. He did not like the fact that Darius was centering all his time on me. He wanted me gone, so one night he left the key to my chains laying at my feet and told me to be gone by morning, that’s it. It took me hours to finally reach that key, but I did it. And I never looked back. I found out we were in Seattle, WA and I made my way over the border into Canada. That is when Brother Luca found me, he cleaned me up and helped me."
"I guess I owe him then." Spike said.
"Owe him for what?" Marissa asks him.
"For bringing you back into my life." Spike simply stated.
"Am I back into your life, how do you figure this?" Marissa questioned him.
"I’ve decided I’m not letting you go this time. No matter how long it takes you to face this fact." Spike said.
"It is not your decision to make. It does not make a difference anyway. I do not think I can have the kind of relationship your asking for." Marissa spoke so quietly he barely heard her.
"I’m holding you now and you’re not running away, want to try an experiment?" Spike chuckled.
"What experiment?" Marissa asks.
"This." Spike bent his head and pressed his lips to her ear. "Does this frighten you?"
"N . . . no." Marissa stuttered. It didn’t frighten her, but it made her feel things she hadn’t felt in a long time. She could feel her womb throbbing. She felt a tinglieness slowly moving up her insides.
"What about this?" He moved his hand and gently laid it against her lower belly, once again she felt her insides tighten. He pressed his hand inward pulling her tighter against him. Her bottom was pressed into the V of his legs. She felt his erection against her lower back. For one second she stiffened, his fingers relaxed. After a few moments he gentled tugged her against him again.
"How does this make you feel?" Spike whispered into her ear, reaching out with his tongue he swirled it in the creases of her upper ear.
"I . . .I do not know what you want from me . . . you cannot want me, you . . ." Marissa’s voice shook.
He pressed his hips into hers. "What does this tell you, you think I can just turn that on and off?"
Marissa turned her head and looked into his eyes. "Why, why are you doing this? Are you trying to help the little freak? Trying to reassure me that I am not one of Darius’s cast off?"
"I’m being the selfish son-of-a-bitch that I am. I want you, here, tonight. I want you on this floor in that bed, anywhere I can have you." Spike said bluntly.
"The others . . . they are waiting for us . . . we cannot do this, not . . . not now." Marissa’s voice trembled as she spoke. No matter what she said Spike knew he wasn’t the only one effected.
"They’ll wait. It’s not as if their going anywhere tonight." He decided to go for broke, see what she would do. "I’m gonna kiss you again, do you want that?"
Marissa opened her lips to deny him. She couldn’t let him do this.
"Yes." Once again her brain took over for her.
Spike’s lips pressed against hers. She opened her mouth to tell him no, brought her hands up to push him away. But it never happened, she opened her mouth and his tongue pressed inside. The world stopped at that moment, everything else disappeared, the people waiting on them at the library, Darius, the world. Nothing else mattered. Spike was the only thing she was aware of. She darted her tongue across his, lightly, gently like a child taking her first steps. This is something they had done a thousand times before, but it felt different tonight, more sensitive, more exotic. She felt her womb clench again. She laid her open hands on his chest, ran them up to his collarbone and curled her fingers around his neck. Spike moved his hand up her stomach coming to rest at the gentle slope of her breast, he stretched his finger’s up until he felt the small nub pressing against her dress. He twirled it between his thumb and forefinger.
Spike lifted his head, her lips tried to follow him but he wouldn’t let her kiss him again, not yet. "Do you want me to stop?"
Marissa looked into his eyes, she didn’t understand what he had said, she had seen his lips move, but she couldn’t comprehend the words. He spoke again. "Do you want me to stop? This is your last chance, if you say yes, we stop, we’re out of here and back to the library. But if you say no, once we start I won’t be able to stop, do you understand me Ris?"
"Yes I understand you." She looked into his face. Did she want to stop, did she want this to end? If Darius killed her tomorrow would she want to die without being in William’s arms again?
"Make love to me William, please?" Marissa said. She hadn’t finished saying the words before Spike stood with her in his arms and walked to the bed, placing one knee on the coverlet he laid her down gently with her head back against the white lace pillowcases. He pulled his arms out of his duster and threw it on the floor. She reached for him, but he laid her arms onto the bed along side her head.
"Wait." He said. He walked to the dresser and picked something up. Marissa heard the strike of a match and watched him light the many candles she had around the room. As he passed the door he reached up and flicked the switch and the room was engulfed in candlelight.
"You remembered." Marissa said shyly. The time he spent lighting the candles also gave her time to compose herself. She wanted this, no matter what happened between them after tonight, she wanted this moment.
Spike smiled. "You like the way the candlelight shimmers against the walls, turning everything into a magical place. Yes, I remember. I remember everything about you Ris."
He walked back to the bed, sitting down beside her he started to unbutton his shirt. She reached up and helped him, as soon as the shirt was removed he reached for her dress straps.
"I do like this dress, have I mentioned that yet?" Spike said as he pulled her straps down her arms, she pulled her arms free and lifted her hips up as he pulled the dress off of her. It joined his shirt on the floor. She lay there in nothing but black lace underwear, he ran a finger over the elastic waistband and chuckled. "No as enticing as the underwear, but I still like the dress."
"It was Willow’s idea. She and Cordelia dressed me tonight. For you I imagine." She lightly stroked her fingers up his cool chest. He put his hands over hers and slowly maneuvered them down to his zipper.
"Red has more going on in that brain of hers than research I’d say." Spike smiled.
Marissa pressed her fingers against his zipper, she felt how hard he was, she knew he wanted her, the evidence was under her palm. She lightly squeezed him through the material. "I would say Oz is a lucky boy."
"Not as lucky as I am." Spike said. He bent down and kissed her again. Her mouth opened under his, running her tongue over his lips, she sucked his bottom lip into her mouth. Spike’s groan told her he approved.
He pulled away and stood and in one motion opened his pants and thrust them down his hips. He stepped out of them, using one foot he tossed them to the small pile that was growing on the floor.
He joined her on the bed, laying on his side. He pulled her against him. His hardness pressing into her belly. "I don’t want to hurt you, but I don’t know how long I can last. It’s been a long time for me."
"But what about Druscilla?" Marissa asked, she didn’t want to know, but the question was out of her mouth before she could stop herself.
"Dru hasn’t been in my bed since Angelus returned to the fold." Spike told her. "And even before that we didn’t have a normal relationship. Dru’s appetites are different. She’s more into pain than sex. I’ve never made love to Dru."
"Is that what we are going to do, make love?" Marissa asks.
He smiled and slowly turned them until she was half under him. Yes, that is what we are doing, what do you want from me "bend over baby?"
Marissa chuckled. "Bend over baby, is that one of your favorite lines? No wonder it has been a long time for you."
"You’d be amazed at what works." He said with a smile. He lowered his head and trailed his lips down her collarbone. Nipping and licking his way between her breasts. He moved his head to the side and took her nipple into his mouth, sucking lightly. He heard her gasp. He swirled it around with his tongue. Then bit down gently.
Marissa couldn’t stop the moan that escaped her lips, nor the shivers that went through her body. She hadn’t felt this way in a long time. Darius’ touch had brought her pain, nothing but pain. Thinking of him brought a coldness over her body. Spike felt her go stiff. He raised his head to look into her face.
"What baby, did I hurt you?" He asks her.
"No, just a ghost coming back to haunt me." Marissa lifted her hand and stroked it over the back of his head. "Ghosts that can never hurt me again."
He knew she was thinking about Darius. "Its Darius’ shame, not yours, never yours."
"Touch me William, make me forget." She asks him.
And he did.