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LITTLE SHOP OF HORREDS
(by Rogue)
Scene:Ed and Eddy are waiting for Double D.
Eddy:Have you finished making something that's going to make me rich
yet,Double D?
Ed:Big butt,so what?
(Double D enters with a plant)
Double D:Here we are!
Eddy:That's it?A plant?
Ed:Cool!
Double D:It's not just any plant Eddy-
Ed:Is it a strange vegetable from outerspace that appeared one day during a total eclipse of the sun and will force us all to sing and dance under some magical curse?
Double D:Uh...let's not get carried away,Ed.
Eddy:Double D,this is stupid!No one is gonna pay to come see you flower!
Double D:It is not a flower,Eddy!It's a flytrap of some sorts...I just
haven't been able to identify it.
Ed:It's an alien!
Eddy:(ignoring Ed)And this is going to help us...how?
Double D:Wouldn't you pay to see a new and unidentified species of plant?
Eddy:No.
Ed:I would!
Double D:Plenty of people would.
Eddy:You can't be serious!There is no way the kids are gonna come running to see a plant without a name!
(Double D sets plant off set.Jonny enters)
Jonny:Wow!(looking at plant)Look at that thing,Plank!That's awesome guys!
Double D:Why thank you,Jonny.
Jonny:What kind of plant is it?
Ed:It is an alien!
Double D:(frowns at Ed)Er...it's a new species.
Jonny:Haha!That's so cool!
Ed:Wanna pet it?
Eddy:Pet the plant?
Jonny:Sure!
(Jonny goes to pet plant)
Double D:Well Eddy,I hate to say I told you so...
Eddy:Just shut up and take Jonny's cash!
Ed:Ok!(turns to Jonny)Give us your cash,Jonny!
Jonny:Sure thing,Ed!
(hands Ed a stack of bills)
Ed:Green paper!
Eddy:Great!Get more kids!
Double D:I don't think that's such a good idea.The plant doesn't look too
good...
Eddy:It's just hungry.Feed it.
Double D:Well I would,but there's the small factor that I DON'T KNOW WHAT IT EATS!!!
Ed:It eats people!
Double D:Ed, that's disgusting.
Ed:I want pudding skins.
Jonny:(from offstage)Hey,it's opening it's trap!Wait...what the-AHHHHHH!!!
Double D:Gracious!
Ed:The plant ate Jonny!
Eddy:(counting money,not listening)What?Oh,that's nice.
Double D:Eddy,are you even listening?The plant just devoured a human
being!Not to mention a piece of wood...
Eddy:Big deal,this plant is gonna make us RICH!
Double D:Eddy,we've got trouble!With a capital T,and that rhymes with P,and that stands for plant!
Ed:This is not good,Eddy!
Eddy:Will you two calm down!So the plant ate one kid,no one's gonna notice.
Ed:He's not listening,Double D!
Double D:It looks like we'll have to stop this ourselves,Ed.The fate of the cul-de-sac is in our hands!
Ed:Nothing can defeat the claw!
(SCENE 2:Ed and Double D enter with spatulas)
Double D:I really don't see how spatulas are going to help us...
Ed:They always work in the movies,Double D!Watch...TIME TO DIE,ALIEN PLANT!!!
(jumps off set)
Double D:Here goes nothing...and it is NOT an alien,Ed!
(Double D follows Ed.Eddy enters)
Eddy:Hey Ed,Double D...guys?Where did they go?
(hears plant burp,and spatulas fly out)
Eddy:What the...Ed's spatulas?OH NO!!!The plant ate them too!But...but I can't do scams without them!ED! DOUBLE D! I'M COMING IN FOR YA!!!
(Eddy jumps in)
Ed:(heard offstage)EDDY!!!You found us!
Double D:(also offstage)Eddy?
Jonny:Hiya Eddy!Now we can all be together in this small,sticky plant!
Eddy:What possessed me to jump in here with you people?
~END~
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