Teenagers and Cats

TEENAGERS AND CATS - ANY SIMILARITIES?
(Are any of you CAT lovers?)

If you live or have ever lived under the same roof with teenagers, and you also have cats, then you may be able to see a lot of the same characteristics in their behaviors.

See what I mean with these observations:

--1. Neither teenagers nor cats turn their heads when you call them by name.

--2. No matter what you do for them, it is not enough. Indeed, all humane efforts are barely adequate to compensate for the privilege of waiting on them hand and foot.

--3. You rarely see a cat walking outside of the house with an adult human being, and it can be safely said that no teenager in his or her right mind wants to be seen in public with his or her parents.

--4. Even if you tell jokes as well as Jay Leno, neither your cat nor your teen will ever crack a smile.

--5. No cat or teenager shares your taste in music.

--6. Cats and teenagers can lie on the living-room sofa for hours on end without moving, barely breathing.

--7. Cats have nine lives. Teenagers carry on as if they did.

--8. Cats and teenagers yawn in exactly the same manner, communicating that ultimate human ecstasy... a sense of complete and utter boredom.

--9. Cats and teenagers do not improve anyone's furniture.

--10. Cats that are free to roam outside sometimes have been known to return in the middle of the night to deposit a dead animal in your bedroom. Teenagers are not above that sort of behavior.

Want to know how to raise teens, then? Keep and read regularly a guidebook on cats! Plus, keep plenty of food out, and make no sudden moves! They'll respond with affection for you sooner or later, and it will be marvelous!