You've got to love the Irish
"Personal ads" in the Dublin News
Heavy drinker, 35, Cork area. Seeks gorgeous sex addict interested in a
man who loves his pints, cigarettes, Glasgow Celtic Football Club and starting
fights on Patrick Street at three o'clock in the morning.
Bitter, disillusioned Dublin man, lately rejected by long-time fiancee,
seeks decent, honest, reliable woman, if such a thing still exists in this
cruel world of hatchet-faced bitches.
Ginger haired Galway man, a trouble-maker, gets slit-eyed and shirty
after a few scoops, seeks attractive, wealthy lady for bail purposes, maybe
more.
Bad tempered, foul-mouthed old bastard, living in a damp cottage in the
arse end of Roscommon, seeks attractive 21 year old blonde lady, with a
lovely chest.
Devil-worshipper, Offaly area, seeks like-minded lady, for wining and
dining, good conversation, dancing, romantic walks, and slaughtering cats in
cemeteries at midnight under the flinty light of a pale moon.
Limerick man, 27, medium build, brown hair, blue eyes, seeks alibi for
the night of February 27 between 8 PM and 11:30 PM.
Optimistic Mayo man, 35, seeks a blonde 20 year old double-jointed
supermodel, who owns her own brewery, and has an open-minded twin sister.