Hillary Clinton died and went to heaven. As she stood in front of St. Peter at the Pearly Gates, she saw a huge wall behind him full of clocks. She asked: "What are all those clocks?"
St. Peter answered, "These are LIE CLOCKS. Everyone on earth has a lie clock. Every time you lie, the hands on the clock will move."
"Oh," said Hillary. "Whose clock is that?"
"That's Mother Teresa's. The hands have never moved-indicating she never told a lie."
"Whose clock is that?"
"That's Abraham Lincoln's clock. The hands have only moved twice, telling us that Abe only told 2 lies in his entire life."
"Where's Bill's clock?" Hillary asked.
"Bill's clock is in Jesus' office. He's using it as a ceiling fan."