Washington Post: Sunday May 14, 1995, Final Edition:
On a cardboard windshield sun shade: "Warning: Do Not Drive With Sun Shield in Place."
On an infant's bathtub: Do not throw baby out with bath water.
On a package of Fisherman's Friend(R) throat lozenges: Not meant as substitute for human companionship.
On a disposable razor: Do not use this product during an earthquake.
On a handgun: Not recommended for use as a nutcracker.
On a piano: Harmful or fatal if swallowed.
On a can of Fix-a-Flat: Not to be used for breast augmentation.
On work gloves: For best results, do not leave at crime scene.
On a blender: Not for use as an aquarium.
On a microscope: Objects are smaller and less alarming than they appear.
On children's alphabet blocks: Letters may be used to construct words, phrases and sentences that may be deemed offensive.
On a wet suit: Capacity, 1.
On The Washington Post: Do not cut up and use for blackmail note.