The Worst Pickup Lines
Why is your hair so big?
Do you have a quarter because my mom said to call when I met the girl/boy of my dreams.
Did you make your own jacket?
Hey, wanna come over to my place and play twister?
I have 11 toes.
Wanna see my scar?
Whoa -- that's some impressive zit you got there!
You remind me of my mom/dad.
Your father must be a thief because he stole the stars and put them into your eyes.
You want fries with that?
Are your legs tired because you have been running through my mind all night?
If I could rewrite the alphabet I would put "U" and "I" together.
Wanna see something scary?
Excuse me, but ... would you like to see my collection of curly nose hairs?
I hate it when my mom packs me baloney.
Pull my finger.
Can I try on your shoes?
So you wanna come over and shave my back?
Your eyes are like limpid pools of primeval ooze -- and I'm the protozoa who longs to swim in their depths.
My wife/husband just doesn't understand me.
I'm looking for a sturdy-type woman to bear my children and work my farm.
Bet you didn't know I can belch the alphabet.
My mom's picking me up in a half hour -- wanna ride home?
Wanna come back to my place? I have all the Loveboat episodes taped and we can watch 'em.
Don't you hate it when someone uses a cheesy pick-up line?
Oh, to be a splash of ketchup on your fry, that I might touch your lips.
Hey Bebe your legs must b tired cuz u been walking through my head all day.
Your poodle is so cute, he looks just like you
Don't you hate it when your mom licks a cleanex and rubs the spaghetti sauce from your face!
If you were gravy, I'd sop you up with a biscuit.
Man! What happened to you?
Hey lovekitten, I don't need to know the specials because you're the catch of the day.
Hey baby, I like your shirt but it would look even better on my floor.
If beauty were a tree.. you would be a whole forest
Why is your hair so greasy?
Why do you have no friends?
I have to go to a computer seminar in Washington D.C. this weekend. Want to go with me?
Is your name Gillette? 'Cause you're the best a man can get.
My mom told me to go to the pound and pick up a dog, but I guess I don't have to go. I already found one.
Would you please be the mother of my children?
Are those real?
Are you doing anything for the next forty or fifty years?
Do you know what would look good on you?.......ME!
You look just like my last girlfriend, but she was fat. Wow! You look JUST LIKE HER!!!!!
You make my mountain dew.
(Say this one at a pizza store.) I'd like you with nothing on.
I'm a Warlock
Would you like to help me alphabetize my record collection?
I don't know, I kinda like that smell.
Did it hurt................when you fell from heaven?
Could you help me pick out a blouse for my wife?
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