SPACE COWBOYS (2000) *1/2

Reviewed 8/19/00

Feeling snubbed by one-time boss Bob Gerson (James Cromwell) for making a chimp the first American in outer space instead of him, Frank Corvin (Clint Eastwood) is not too thrilled when decades later, NASA's Sara Holland (Marcia Gay Harden) comes to his door asking him to help them save a deteriorating Russian satellite that somehow has Corvin's technical designs. Those designs are so old that even Ethan Glance (Loren Dean), an astronaut with two Master degrees from MIT, can't figure them out. Gerson wants Corvin to save this communications satellite so badly that he's willing to let old foe Corvin enlist his entire crew of old folks (read late 60s) to fly the mission. This urgency probably has something to do with Gerson and the Russian representative throwing knowing glances at each other throughout the movie. Let's see, Russia, Cold War, hmm, what could it possibly be? Anyway, Corvin's designated crew of old partners include now-preacher Tank Sullivan (James Garner), libidinous Jerry O'Neil (Donald Sutherland), and most troublesome of all, throw-caution-to-the-winds "Hawk" Hawkins (Tommy Lee Jones), with whom Corvin hasn't spoken in 12 years.

Space Cowboys tries not to take its improbable situation too seriously while at the same time being too serious with themes like honor and glory that unfortunately tie in too closely with the ridiculous plot. Some movies can overcome such weaknesses (Vertigo being the preeminent example), but Space Cowboys just doesn't provide enough other pleasures to keep one's mind off the implausibilities. While Eastwood directs and stars, Tommy Lee Jones, the most grounded of the actors, steals the film and winds up the only interesting character. Sutherland is basically just comic relief. Garner isn't even that. His role is so undefined, his character's dancing doll keepsake almost has more personality. Garner's waste is really unfortunate considering he was so good in another old-men movie, My Fellow Americans. And poor Harden almost manages some poignancy as Hawk's love interest while getting to sport the worst haircut in a movie since Yahoo Serious.

Now, the implausibilities (which could potentially give away plot points, so if concerned, read no further): we have to believe the Russians displayed absolutely zero forethought when creating this surprisingly sophisticated yet ancient satellite; we have to believe these folks in their late 60s, some with no physical training in decades, can pass rigorous astronaut physicals; we have to believe a certain man values his job more than tens of millions of lives; we have to believe the public would vigorously encourage sending old men into space at the cost of millions of tax dollars. Anyway, you get the picture.

The climax does manage to elicit some suspense, but more out of the situation than through character. Eastwood, who has limited experience with special effects-driven action scenes has a hard time keeping the action clear and in perspective, but what was really needed was a lot more Jones instead of Eastwood.